Submitted by Rabbi Arthur Waskow on
By Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi
T'nai Kiddushin.
Conditions of Kiddushin and Nissu'in
[This document, intended to be adopted in both Hebrew and English at an impending wedding before acceptance of the ketubah, is an attempt in the context of traditional rabbinic halacha to prevent the danger that even though a marriage has in fact and ethics ended, one of the couple might remain unable under traditional Jewish law to be freed from the marriage so as to be able to remarry. It does this by providing that under certain conditions, the marriage will be deemed null and void from the start. (This has no effect on the status of children. -- AW]
By the grace of heaven on the day of the week, the day of the month in the year since the creation of the world, according to the reckoning which we are accustomed to use here in the city of in , son of of the family the bridegroom, said to daughter of of the family , the bride: "Be my wife according to the law of Moses and Israel solely upon the following conditions:
(1) If a duly qualified Beth Din should ever adjudge that I ought to divorce you, and I shall have failed to give you a valid Get within six months after they have so adjudged -- whether because I refuse to give you or you refuse to accept from me a valid Get, or because you or I demand money or some other gratuity for giving or accepting the Get, or because I be afflicted by a physical or mental illness which prevent me from giving and you from accepting a Get-- then this Kiddushin shall become void as of now, but if no duly qualified Beth Din ever adjudge that I ought to divorce you, or if a duly qualified beth Din adjudge that I ought to divorce you and I shall have given you a valid Get within six months after they shall so have adjudged, then this Kiddushin shall be unconditional;
(2) If our marriage should ever be dissolved according to some law or usage other than the law of Moses and Israel, and I shall have failed to have you a valid Get within six months after it shall so have been dissolved--whether because I refuse to give you or you refuse to accept from me a valid Get, or because I demand money or some other gratuity for giving the Get, or because you demand money or some other gratuity for accepting the Get, or because I be afflicted by a physical or a mental illness which prevent me from giving a Get, or because you be afflicted by a physical or mental illness which prevents you from accepting a Get--then this Kiddushin shall become void as of now, but if our marriage never be dissolved according to any law or usage other than the law of Moses and Israel, or if it should be so dissolved and I shall have given you a valid Get within six months after such dissolution, then this Kiddushin shall be unconditional.
(3) If we should ever separate from one another for a period of two years, during which time a duly qualified Beth Din be unable to ascertain beyond doubt either that I am living or that I am dead, then this Kiddushin shall become void as of now, but if we never separate from one another for a period of two years, or if we separate form one another for a period of two years during which time a duly qualified Beth Din ascertain beyond doubt either that I am living or that I am dead, then this Kiddushin shall be unconditional;
(4) If I should die without having begotten a child, and if at the time of my death I have a paternal brother, and if he shall have failed to perform with you the rite of Halitzah within six months following my death--whether because he refuses to perform Halitzah with you, or because you refuse to perform Halitzah with him, or because either he or you demand money or some other gratuity for performing Halitzah, or because either he or you be afflicted by a physical or mental illness which prevents him or you from performing Halitzah--then this Kiddushin shall become void as of now, but if I die after having begotten a child, or if I die without having begotten a child and at the time of my death I have no paternal brother, or if I die without having begotten a child a t the time of my death I have a paternal brother and he shall have performed with you the rite of Halitzah within six months following my death, then this Kiddushin shall be unconditional;
(5) If, during the life of our marriage, I should ever beget a child upon any woman other than you, or you should ever conceive a child by any other man other than me, then this Kiddushin shall become void as of now, but if, during the life of our marriage, I never beget a child upon any woman other than you, and you never conceive a child by any man other than me, then this Kiddushin shall be unconditional. Solely upon these conditions do I make you my wife and take you into my household and consummate with you this Kiddushin."
Solely upon these conditions did daughter of of the family the bride, consent to become his wife, and solely upon these conditions does she enter his household and consummate with him this Kiddushin. And thus did the bridegroom and bride declare together: "As for any statement we may in future make, or any sign we may in future give--by any manner of stating or of signalling which would negate these conditions or cast any doubt upon them, we hereby render such statement or such sign void as of now, since it is solely upon these conditions that we marry."
Now, son of of the family , the bridegroom, and daughter of of the family the bride, have accepted the conditions set forth in this document as binding, with the force of all conditions and agreement executed among the Jewish people in accordance with the enactment of our sages, of blessed memory, and not as an indecisive contractual obligation or a stereotyped form. We have completed with them the act of acquisition for all that which is stated and explained above, by an instrument legally fit to establish a transaction. Everything is valid and established.
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